Being here sucks big time..

But I believe my presence sucks even more for someone. Wahaha!!

F**ck yourself b*tch! 

I try to live my life to the fullest. Breathe like there's no more air for the next second. Laugh until my alveoli burst into segments. Cry to dehydration. Love till my heart breaks into pieces. LIVE LIFE AS IF THERE IS NO TOMMOROW.

It's been almost 2 years since i last did my entry..

Miss hanging out with my girls, go party every other night dancing with margarita/mojito at the club and stuff.. I am not that happy since i worked. I like my work though. Its just that..... Not too much.. Especially having string of backstabbers.. Oh no!! God knows how i would just want to be alone. I love it being a loner for the first time! Wahahaha! I dont like the team honestly. I guess something's wrong.. With me! Hahaha.. Who cares?! Nah.. I tried so hard to cope with them. Lord knows that. But they just keep doing me wrong.. And i dont want to try to be with them no more.

I'm bored with the topic!

I am full. Karen and i ate burgers and friessssssssss.

Till here.. See yah later bitches!!

Playing Hard-To-Get requires you to be calm, centered and focused, but this can be really difficult if you have weak or even no protective boundaries. You become easily confused about what to do next. But when you have clear boundaries you are stronger, more calm and clear headed and at the same time warm, caring and loving. This increases your desirability and marketability. A boundary is that defining space which clarifies "you" and "me" -- where you end and where the other begins. Having healthy boundaries means that others respect your personal space and do not intrude on your privacy. It also means that you give others their space and respect their boundaries. You’re deeply connected to them, but you still maintain a sense of your own identity and don’t allow yourself to be swallowed up by the other person. Don’t confuse maintaining good personal boundaries with "putting up a wall". A wall is a solid structure that keeps you inside and keeps everyone else out. A person with good boundaries can easily say “no” and yet still be open. Boundaries need not be too rigid that they incapacitate the relationship or too loose that they are easily misinterpreted. The important thing is that you are both fully aware of where you are in terms of feelings and commitment to the relationship, how you define it, what pace you want to take, what you can and cannot tolerate. Boundaries help define your value… Imagine that your real estate agent tells you that you could get a higher price if you repaired the broken hinges and painted the fence around your property. The benefit of the fence appears in the value of the property. And when someone buys the property they will get some benefit from the fence in addition to the value they get from the rest of the property. This is the principle behind having clear boundaries. A poorly built fence can reduce property value. Weak or no boundaries give men and women the sense that you are just fishing for anything that your net catches and they just happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Even if you make an external show of strength you may actually do quite a lot more compromising and placating than you are consciously aware of, if you are secretly feeling shaky or insecure. When you have boundaries, you can say "no" in a way that doesn't feel like "no" to the other person… If for example, you find out that someone is only asking you out because someone else turned them down, it’ll be to your best interest to remind him/her that you are there and friendly but you are also an individual with a life to live (I am assuming you have one). A response along the lines, “Thank you, but I won't play second fiddle to anyone. I’d rather be number #1 in your life” will send a clear message that this is not something you are willing to tolerate. When you say nothing, there is a negative impact for you and for the other person. Saying nothing conveys the message that the behavior is acceptable; thus the person is more likely to repeat it. Fearing that you will disappoint or upset him/her somehow if you set boundaries only makes you lose respect and desirability. You must respect yourself first if you want to be respected. Say "no" in a way that is polite and from the heart… Saying no doesn’t necessitate telling the other person they’re wrong for making the request. For instance, “I’m okay if you socialize with other men/women, but I am not okay with you…. with them” tells the other person what you will and will not tolerate in a way that doesn't compromise the relationship. What you will and will not tolerate depends on where you are in terms of feelings and commitment to the relationship. You don't need to explain, rationalize or analyze their response. If they try to object or create a scene, just repeat, " I am just not okay with you…. with them”. Be friendly, but firm. Boundaries are a measure of self-esteem... Standing your ground increases your credibility. It makes you more desirable because it allows you to remain open and receptive to the other person as well as retain a sense of separate identity. Good boundaries say you are very selective because you value yourself -- and value the people you let into your life. But setting boundaries is not a more sophisticated way of manipulation. Some people will say they are setting boundaries, when in fact they are attempting to manipulate. The difference between setting a boundary in a healthy way and manipulating is: when we set a boundary we let go of the outcome. Clear boundaries keeps things running smoothly, but sometimes despite best intentions, boundaries are crossed. Don’t be too rigid. Adapt to the moment -- know when to put your foot down and when to let things slide.

39. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out.

38. Telling us that the models in the men's magazines are airbrushed makes you look jealous and petty and it's certainly not going to deter us from reading the magazine.

37. Consider Golf a mini-vacation from you. We need it, just like you do.

36. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.

35. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

34. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done -- not both.

33. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?

32. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one

31. If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

30. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.

29. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together.

28. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.

27. Don't give us 50 rules when 25 will do.

26. Check you oil.

25. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.

24. Your Mom doesn't have to be our best friend.

23. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

22. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.

21. Most guys own two or three pairs of shoes -- What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

20. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.

19. No, he doesn't know what day it is. He never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.

18. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.

17. Your brother is an idiot, you ex-boyfriend is an idiot and your Dad probably is too.

16. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.

15. You have too many shoes.

14. You have enough clothes.

13. Anything you wear is fine. Really.

12. Shopping is not a sport.

11. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

10. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.

9. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like every other cat.

8. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and monster trucks.

7. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.

6. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

5. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if he can find the perfect present, again!

4. Don't cut your hair. Ever.

3. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put it down.

2. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

AND FINALLY, THE NUMBER ONE RULE:
1. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.

You are mine to remember..

You'll be the first, and you'll be the last... I see inside..

At first,

You said it was real

You said it fair right..

Deep inside...

Something certainly changed inside of me

Take it all away maybe you would say you miss me too..

I'll get myself right.. 

I'm in between.

Walk away....

Don't walk away from me...........

Give me another day to say i want you too..

Give another day so I can say I love you too...

You are mine to remember..

I'm back...  I mean, the guy I was talkin' about on my previous entry and i are fine again.. Very fine. =)

So.. I guess I'll be seeing this page not so soon.. again.. But of course, maybe i'll be writing stuff here again but not too depressing like the previous..

Ciao! Till i write again.. mwah mwah!

It's been a while... Grabe, i feel so numb... I'm suppose to be hurting right now.... Parang na immune na yata ako with all the same=old=bad things that are happening with my personal life. Numb tapos in a little while, sobrang depressed. (sigh) Can i just die? Really now.. Oh god! This is bu**s**t! They (men) are really giving me trauma already.. They're not suppose to make girls feel this way. I mean, there are a lot of men out there but why is this guy affecting me so much that i can't even smile anymore because of what he's done.. Other people thought I had the most romantic love stories in life. They thought I always get the man I want... Actually... No.. I don't. Now i undestand the saying "So near, yet so far" Cheesy but I can't help but say it. Anyhow, he's a jerk! Yeah, yeah, i'm sour graping. I know. But really.. He is. Hay... I'm sorry for saying that. But.. When can they ever be faithful? Will they really be faithful? Well, (segway) here's a trivia... Only 2% in the world's population of men are faithful with their partners or partners-to-be. I've been experiencing same old love story and i don't understand it anymore why it keeps on happening to me.. Am i too what??!! Have i been a total bad girl?! Why didn't i see it coming... again? So i can prepare and protect myself.. Do I deserve this? It's irritating. Nakakababa pa ng self-esteem. And it's a loss men! Whether it happened recently or not. It's still a loss. So it happened to me when i was in high school, it happened again this college, what's going to be left of me? Finals ko next week... I can't be too depressed. And I've got a lot of homeworks to work on, tests to review for. And I can't concentrate anymore. I've been catching myself just staring at my notes and stuff. I have to focus! Really! I just want to bring myself back. I guess i'm lost right now. My life's better without men i guess. They came into my life just to make me weak... And successfully..... They did.. Thanks ha?!  Yeah, you made me weak, you were successful.. Congrats! But here's one thing i can say though, I won't let you screw me up perfectly. If only I have the guts to say these words under your nose, I will.. I don't want to see your freakin' face anymore.  You.Are.Such.A.Pain.In.The.Ass.